Jim Carrey doesn't exist anymore
What is it with truly great comedians, that they spend most of their lives trying to figure out who they really are?Buster Keaton, Andy Kaufman, Robin Williams - since comedy was silent, the funniest actors have sprung from the saddest men.When cloaks fall, there is alcoholism, cancer and depression.It shocks us because we're used to see them smile and making us laugh.For Carrey, it was a tragic incident, the suicide of his girlfriend, which seems to have catapulted him from The Cable Guy to one of the most interesting artists in Hollywood.Two years ago, Cathriona White was found dead in her apartment. She had been dating the actor for three years.Photos taken at her funeral show a shattered Carrey carrying her coffin on his shoulders.But from that point on, he was nowhere to be seen; no films, no guest show appearances.The actor who once made four films in a year became a recluse.Then, nearly two years later, a short film was spotted online, showing the 55-year-old star painting weird, fluorescent canvases showing Jesus faces and bleeding hearts."I needed colour," he says to the camera. So he went and got it.At first, I wasn't sure what I was looking at. Is it a sketch? A mockumentary? Is he teasing us - the media, the audience?With comedians, you never know.But then, somewhere throughout the film, Carrey's paintings became interesting to me - they felt true. So did his words."You can choose not to do it," he says, his voice a distant echo. "You can choose to try to do something safer.""Your vocation chooses you," he said. He might have a point, I thought. Whether or not you think his art is any good, here's a public figure taking an enormous risk being someone people don't want him to be. Serious, sad, troubled - is there anything less funny?After that, a series of headline-friendly interviews followed. Public outbursts, philosophical rants.The latest one happened at a fashion show in New York, when the actor was spotted walking the red carpet by a reporter."There's no meaning to any of this," he started by saying. "I wanted to find the most meaningless thing I could come to and join and here I am."The fashion reporter, in her obliviousness, reminded the actor the gala was celebrating "icons"."Don't you believe in icons?," she asks. He laughed."Boy, that is just the absolute lowest-aiming possibility that we could come up with," Carrey added, and then proceeded to explain why he does not, in fact, believe in icons - but rather personalities.